Fazed

I'm tired and grumpy. I've worked 3 night shifts in a row and was back at uni in the early afternoon today.

In fact, I was so grotty today that I picked a fight with a little old lady. She started it to be fair. Going around hitting my bike because it's in your way won't get you very far. Perhaps saying 'excuse me' would?

Anyway, I digress.

I'm getting a little fazed by the whole 'auxiliary' thing. I'm getting frustrated by the physical aspect of it all.

My shoulders have been pulled, and are now regularly aching and spasming. I've been punched, kicked, spat at, scratched, had my hair and uniform pulled, and generally been abused. All of this by people over the age of 65.

I sometimes feel we're failing the patients. I feel rough and cruel, and almost inhuman with it all sometimes. I do things that the patients are confused about, mainly down to personal hygiene. But I feel I'm being a bully. I guess it all comes down to mental competence at the end of the day.

That, and I'm tired.