19 February 2007

Still here...

Yup I'm still here - I just needed the weekend off.

Ironically I didn't do as I planned and stay in bed, rather I woke up very early on both days and started to come down with the mother of all colds.

Why is it that on the weekend I can't sleep in (when I would really want to), yet on weekdays I can't get up early and continue to sleep through the alarm clock (multiple times).

With regards to medical school, I just feel the need to re-evaluate my position here. I'm not entirely enjoying the course and it's not what I expected. I'm beginning to wonder if it wasn't all about the chase in the end.

I'm not angry, but I am disappointed in myself. I fought so hard to get here and I'm now not sure if I'm even going to make it, never mind stick it out.

Anyway, enough of the moaning - I have a PBHell assignment to do!


Conkers said...

A really interesting post Merys, because from my perspective of advising youngsters applying to medicine, and being married to a doctor, I have to say that your point about 'wondering if it was all about the chase in the end' is a very valuable insight. So many of the people I come across who are desperate to get into medical school have no idea about the realities of the course and the career - and of course this isn't entirely surprising in a society which has traditionally glamorised the career/hidden the truth! I think your reactions are completely natural (and I'd go so far as to say shows your intelligence and insight) and I just hope you find a way over time to happily resolve what is best for you. It's not a similar thing of course, but it took me months to decide to leave my speech therapy training - it was agony and took me months to really accept (even after I'd done it) - but on reflection I'm glad I followed my instinct about it. I do hope you feel differently though, when you've had some time off (whenever that might be!)

Merys said...

Don't get me wrong, I still want to be a doctor - I just hate the course and the place and the people on it.
The only thing keeping me here is the end result.

HospitalPhoenix said...

Ooh Merys, you must be made of strong stuff. I hated the first 2 years of medicine and the only thing that kept me there was friends (on and off the course).

Have you got a good mentor or director of studies you could go and chat with? Or even arrange yourself an attachment to a good dept with some good experineces and teachers which might spur you on?

DundeeMedStudent said...

merys said:
Don't get me wrong, I still want to be a doctor - I just hate the course and the place and the people on it.
The only thing keeping me here is the end result.

Yeah- that's exactly how I feel.
if you need to talk email me at dundeemedstudent [at] hotmail [dot] co [dot] uk
(they wouldn't give me a .com account)

Anonymous said...

I really wouldn't bother staying there for the end result, guys.

100% Serious.

The Angry Medic said...

Aww, you poor thing. Get well soon. I know how it feels cos I'm also down with the flu...it's going around the medics here, and it started after a supposedly sterile Bacteriology practical with Strep pyogenes.

You're also not alone in your med school doubts...some of us are still making up our minds about med school, only waking up each morning to the horrifying realisation that too late, you're already IN med school. Hang in there, girl.

Harry said...

I've got a friend who's dropping out of vet school this year - she couldn't take it anymore. Shame, it's what she always wanted to do I just hope she thinks it through thoroughly. Hope this kinda helps?!


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