30 August 2007

Random musings from a night shift

  • Why do elderly patients always know where to grab and exactly how hard to do it? Also, how can you see to grab my left breast in the dark? I can't see you grabbing me, so how are you so damned accurate??
  • Why is it that as soon as I grab a cup of coffee a call bell goes off, or a patient falls out of bed?
  • Why does the call bell make me feel guilty for not moving quicker?
  • How come, after quite a few A&E shifts (of days and nights) I still haven't seen someone with something inserted into an orifice?
  • Why is every Philipino nurse pregnant?
  • How come I always get wee splashed in my face?


The Shrink said...

1) They've had years of practice.

2) With sensory impairement, the're less reliant on sight than you or I will be.

3) As we get older we can regress to being tricksy once again :-)

Anonymous said...

Coffee timed incidents are a regular occurance in all walks of life. I recommend insulated mugs, it kept my tea warm enough to drink 45minutes after I brewed it on Sunday...

Anonymous said...

I'm convinced call bell tones were designed by acoustic engineers to trigger psychological guilt mechanisms.